Feminism - the buzzword we hear every day and wonder what kind of shit that is! Yes, believe me, majority of us think that it is an aggressive stand taken by so called modern-assertive-liberal women. Well, let us not go into the history and details and definitions of feminism because it is a wide area and I would not like to waste your and my time on the theoretical stuff.
I will write here my views and the views I have assimilated from the women I know. I will write what I feel and the readers have every right to disagree with me because some of my view points will be quite aggresive.
The most common understanding of feminism is - women fighting for their rights. Wrong. Another understanding - women want to be successful than men. Wrong. Another one and very common - women eager to treat men the way they have been treated for centuries. Wrong. Another one - women protesting against the inhumanities and inequalities meted out to them. Not entirely wrong but not entirely correct. Well, that is the beauty of this word.
Feminism is believing that men and women are equal. It is believing that what a man does, a woman should do and what a woman does, a man should do. It is believing that men and women are both strong and smart enough to handle their lives single handedly. And yeah, I forgot "equal pay for equal work."
"To call woman the weaker sex is a libel; it is man's injustice to woman."
- Mahatma Gandhi
Injustice by men only? We have been called the weaker sex by women as well as men. We have been bred to believe that we are weak and we always need a man to support or help us. We have been made to believe that "ladies and girls should not do this because it is unlady like, it is not womanly." We have spent our lives being dependent on men. I am not saying it is wrong but aren't we capable enough to do those things ourselves. Some of the common examples are :
1. "I wanna buy a new phone/hard disk/computer, could you just tell me, which one should I buy?" - As if we can not a search for phone specifications and then find out!
2. "Can you tell me which car should I buy, I really don't understand the mileage and whatever.." - We are educated enough to understand the basics! No one is asking us to be a mechanical engineer.
3. "I am not carrying my purse because it is too heavy, please pay the bill, ooohhh pleasssseee..." - My my, that sweetness is actually killing our self respect.
Enough examples, I guess. And angers are stirring as it is widely held notion that this is man's chivalry for women and blah blah. To hell with chivalry! Women expect men to honour them and treat them like queens and it is a convention they should follow. Men must pay the bills on an outing, they should take out the chair in a restaurant and they should open the door of the car - phew! Why can not women pay when they are earning? Why can not women take out the chairs and open the doors of car because it is them who are going to sit. Your man/male friend/brother/father is not your servant.
"I want a man who can handle me." Why? Aren't we capable enough to handle yourself?
"I want a man who protects me." Why? Can't we protect yourself? Can't we stand for ourselves?
We are dependent on men more than they are dependent on us. And that is the reason of our weakness. Period.
" Look at her, what kind of clothes she is wearing?"
A male friend of mine once said that the reason women are not empowered is because they spend their majority of time not using their brains. It felt offensive but now I think of it, the guy was right. We are always bitching, we are always competing with each other, we are always interested in what is happening in others' lives. Many of us are least interested in growing and making ourselves strong. We sniff when there is some intellectual discussion happening.
Women will be emancipated when we stop competing and start supporting each other.
The very common thing which angers all of us is abuse. "Ladki ko gaal nahi dene ka....ladki ka insult nahi karne ka.."
So we get hurt when we are verbally abused. We get hurt when fun is made of us in a weird way. We think that it is our "izzat" which needs to be protected. (I am just talking about verbal abuse and talks here) Why? Do men don't have some amount of respect or "izzat"? Men also feel bad when they are abused (personally or publicly) but they never take it too harshly. Then why we create such brouhaha over abuse and fun?
"Agar ladki ki izzat hai to ladke ki bhi hai." Period.
The very reason of our weakness is that we think we are weak. We think our voices won't be heard. Believe me, we are capable enough to do anything that we want. We don't always have to fight with men to feel equal. Equality comes by believing that men are as important as women. In the name of feminism, we are actually making a case for reservations and quotas. Aren't we capable enough to get to the top? If someone is stopping us just because we are women, then ladies, handle it, fight it. Rome was not built in a day. Change won't come unless you bring change in yourself by making yourself stronger and capable. Explore the world and learn as much as you can. Empowerment comes from knowledge and experiences. Stand up for other women as well as men who are getting unequal treatment.
Enough said.
But as Emma Watson recently said, "Men also get the unequal treatment that women do." Sparkling indeed!
I will write here my views and the views I have assimilated from the women I know. I will write what I feel and the readers have every right to disagree with me because some of my view points will be quite aggresive.
The most common understanding of feminism is - women fighting for their rights. Wrong. Another understanding - women want to be successful than men. Wrong. Another one and very common - women eager to treat men the way they have been treated for centuries. Wrong. Another one - women protesting against the inhumanities and inequalities meted out to them. Not entirely wrong but not entirely correct. Well, that is the beauty of this word.
Feminism is believing that men and women are equal. It is believing that what a man does, a woman should do and what a woman does, a man should do. It is believing that men and women are both strong and smart enough to handle their lives single handedly. And yeah, I forgot "equal pay for equal work."
"To call woman the weaker sex is a libel; it is man's injustice to woman."
- Mahatma Gandhi
Injustice by men only? We have been called the weaker sex by women as well as men. We have been bred to believe that we are weak and we always need a man to support or help us. We have been made to believe that "ladies and girls should not do this because it is unlady like, it is not womanly." We have spent our lives being dependent on men. I am not saying it is wrong but aren't we capable enough to do those things ourselves. Some of the common examples are :
1. "I wanna buy a new phone/hard disk/computer, could you just tell me, which one should I buy?" - As if we can not a search for phone specifications and then find out!
2. "Can you tell me which car should I buy, I really don't understand the mileage and whatever.." - We are educated enough to understand the basics! No one is asking us to be a mechanical engineer.
3. "I am not carrying my purse because it is too heavy, please pay the bill, ooohhh pleasssseee..." - My my, that sweetness is actually killing our self respect.
Enough examples, I guess. And angers are stirring as it is widely held notion that this is man's chivalry for women and blah blah. To hell with chivalry! Women expect men to honour them and treat them like queens and it is a convention they should follow. Men must pay the bills on an outing, they should take out the chair in a restaurant and they should open the door of the car - phew! Why can not women pay when they are earning? Why can not women take out the chairs and open the doors of car because it is them who are going to sit. Your man/male friend/brother/father is not your servant.
"I want a man who can handle me." Why? Aren't we capable enough to handle yourself?
"I want a man who protects me." Why? Can't we protect yourself? Can't we stand for ourselves?
We are dependent on men more than they are dependent on us. And that is the reason of our weakness. Period.
" Look at her, what kind of clothes she is wearing?"
A male friend of mine once said that the reason women are not empowered is because they spend their majority of time not using their brains. It felt offensive but now I think of it, the guy was right. We are always bitching, we are always competing with each other, we are always interested in what is happening in others' lives. Many of us are least interested in growing and making ourselves strong. We sniff when there is some intellectual discussion happening.
Women will be emancipated when we stop competing and start supporting each other.
The very common thing which angers all of us is abuse. "Ladki ko gaal nahi dene ka....ladki ka insult nahi karne ka.."
So we get hurt when we are verbally abused. We get hurt when fun is made of us in a weird way. We think that it is our "izzat" which needs to be protected. (I am just talking about verbal abuse and talks here) Why? Do men don't have some amount of respect or "izzat"? Men also feel bad when they are abused (personally or publicly) but they never take it too harshly. Then why we create such brouhaha over abuse and fun?
"Agar ladki ki izzat hai to ladke ki bhi hai." Period.
The very reason of our weakness is that we think we are weak. We think our voices won't be heard. Believe me, we are capable enough to do anything that we want. We don't always have to fight with men to feel equal. Equality comes by believing that men are as important as women. In the name of feminism, we are actually making a case for reservations and quotas. Aren't we capable enough to get to the top? If someone is stopping us just because we are women, then ladies, handle it, fight it. Rome was not built in a day. Change won't come unless you bring change in yourself by making yourself stronger and capable. Explore the world and learn as much as you can. Empowerment comes from knowledge and experiences. Stand up for other women as well as men who are getting unequal treatment.
Enough said.
But as Emma Watson recently said, "Men also get the unequal treatment that women do." Sparkling indeed!
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